In March when the outside world around us began rapidly shutting down, we shuttered inside our homes and waited. Surely this wouldn’t take long. Surely it wouldn’t take a vaccine to return to normal, whatever that is. I had a vacation planned for July, and for months, that was my hope. If things could just be safe then, we could take our trip and be ourselves again. July came and went. And still, here we are.
Work in our home was not new. I have been working at home for most of the past 3 years since I left the military. Luckily, we had chosen our house and set it up on the idea that I worked from home. My children’s learning came home too. (Notice I said learning, not school. Yet.) Workouts came home in the form of Zoom calls. More dirty dishes came home, more trash, more anxiety, sometimes more tears, more worry, more fears, more laughs, and okay, sometimes more booze. Slowly the outside world and what we used to do invaded home, often through screens, speakers, and information from our devices.
At the same time, we abandoned some things. We stopped dressing up. No more high heels. And sometimes our sanity. The whole family both consciously and unconsciously added and deleted what we needed to get through. This continued through summer as families started asking the question, “what about school?”
Luckily our local school district was quick and decisive. Distance learning would start on the scheduled first day, and continue until at least February. The schools would reevaluate this in the winter. I welcomed this, as it left no decisions on our shoulders. Or so we thought.
As school started, we had high hopes. Especially for children who suffer in the traditional classroom. The home learning environment would afford kids the chance to get their wiggles out while learning in a safe space. But that’s not what happened.
Kids have found themselves trapped in a dimension between school and home. Toys they could see or knew were near begged to be played with. They weren’t allowed to fidget or have something in their hand. They couldn’t eat if they were hungry during class. I get it, these things make sense. But they’re harder to enforce and impress upon kids when they’re in the comfort of home. (Not to mention the fact that adults aren’t held to these same restrictions when working at home.)
By the end of the second week, I was asking friends about homeschooling. And to my surprise, many were already doing it, having pulled their kids from virtual classrooms within weeks of the school year starting. After some research, we decided to homeschool as well.
I thought this decision was born out of flexibility. The kids could play during the day and learn in the evening and on weekends when we were in a pinch. It was a logical choice. But letting school into our home was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Inviting a live camera and microphone. Frustrated teachers and unfocused children could be heard when ears were getting a rest from headphones. It was too much.
So as you begin to feel overwhelmed and wondering when this will end, be patient with yourself. Letting so much into your home is draining. Be aware of what has inched is way into your walls. Take notice, and then let go of what you can for now.
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